Wednesday, January 29, 2020

The Value of Early Marriage in Islam Essay Example for Free

The Value of Early Marriage in Islam Essay Because of Islams great love for marriage, it has strongly emphasized that people get married as soon as possible. This is more so for women, and the Prophet (s) and Imams (as) have strongly emphasized that it is the responsibility of a father to ensure that his daughters become married as soon as possible. This is in order so that the woman may not fall into fornication as a result of not being able to marry, and that this very important part of her life become dealt with as soon as possible. We see this reflected in the following ahadeeth: 1.It is a blessing for a man that his daughter does not menstruate in his home.1 2.The Prophet (s) said in a khutbah: Jibrail came to me from the Subtle and Aware one [Allah (swt)], and said: Indeed, virgin girls are like fruit on a tree. When you take the fruit from a tree, then you do not have to fear that the sun will spoil it or that the wind will scatter it away. Similar is the case when a women is taken in the way that they are taken [meaning marriage]. There is no remedy for this problem except that they take a husband, and if they do not, then one will have to fear that they will become corrupted. Beyond this, Islam also believes that women have a stronger sexual urge then men, and that this urge should be satisfied at an early age. There are many narrations, from both Sunni and Shia sources, that state that women have nine times as much sexual desire as men: 1.Imam Ali (as) said: Allah the Mighty and Glorified has created desire in ten parts; nine of these parts are in women, and one part is in men. Had not Allah (swt) given more power to her modesty than over these parts of desire, then every man would find himself with nine women attached to him. 2.Imam as-Sadiq (as) said: Indeed, Allah the Mighty and Glorious has given women the patience of ten men. If a woman is fighting with you, then it is because she has been given the desire of ten men. 3.Imam as-Sadiq (as) said: Women have been blessed with ninety nine percent of desire, however Allah has placed modesty over them. As such, when a girl is young, this force will be even stronger in her, and so it is more important that she not fall into sin. If a father is to be considered the guardian of his daughter, then it is one of his duties to make sure that she does not fall into sin by using his age and experience to help find for her a proper husband at an early age. It is even said of slave-masters that they should either marry their slave girls or find husband for them, and that if they fornicate, the sin will be on himself. However, Muslims have tended to forget this teaching of the Prophets (s) and Imams (as). The growth of a middle-class throughout the Muslim world has led families to become more concerned with their daughters education and work then with their spiritual life, and fear that if they marry their daughters at an early age, the girls will not be able to complete their education. Even if this were true, it would still be inexcusable to make it difficult for young girls to get married, for then one will be putting pressure on them to fornicate. The fact is that it is not true that girls will somehow fail in life if they marry at an early age. A woman can balance the demands of her marital life and her educational/professional life, and should be allowed and encouraged to do so. It is important, as well, that as girls enter adolescence, that Islam is not being used as a barrier upon them enjoying their life and fulfilling themselves sexually. When Muslim families put pressure on their daughters not to marry and seek to isolate them from this blessing of marriage, it is only natural that many young women will turn against practices like hijab and other aspects of Islam. Lack of satisfaction in the area of sex will lead to depression and frustration, which can manifest itself in a variety of ways. Parents should not only allow their daughters freedom in this regard, but should actively encourage them. The fact is that young men and women will usually get together anyways, and a young woman may very well connect with a young man whose morals and character are less than satisfactory. By families openly involving themselves in this aspect of their daughters life from an early age, they can not only help their daughters to quickly find what they need in terms of their love life, but also help to guide their daughters to a marriage that will be beneficial for her, both emotionally, physically, and spiritually. When the parents refuse to help, however, then they are leaving their daughter to her own devices in finding a path to dealing with her sexuality. She may restrain herself until her family allows her to marry, or she may not. But at that stage, the family will not play any role in that decision one way or the other. It is also the obligation of the family to make it easy for a husband to marry his daughter, and not place the kind of absurd demands upon a prospective husband that are made now. Filled by love of dunya, many families will only marry their daughter to a rich man with a PhD or several degrees in engineering or what have you. This, even more than the restrictions they place on their own daughters, creates a terrible barrier on a young woman getting married, as it makes it impossible for her to find somebody similar in age. Enormous dowries are another source of fitna in this regard, and this practice has been condemned in the ahadeeth: 1.The Prophet (s) said: The best of womenare those who ask for low dories. 2.Imam as-Sadiq (as) states: The blessed of women are those who ask for small living expenses, and the evil of them are those who are demanding in terms of living expenses. The practice of large dowries is even more haram, however, because it is almost always done for the sake of show inside the community, which is a form of shirkthat is most condemned in Islam. We see that, tragically, many families are willing to sacrifice the happiness of their daughter during her adolescence for the sake of their appearance in the community. It is interesting to note that most cases of huge dowry, the daughter had no interest in a large dowry. She would ask for something extremely small, or even want to wave it altogether. But then the family steps in and demands thousands upon thousands of dollars in dowry, and then forces the daughter to make a decision between her husband-to-be and her family. Usually she will choose the family, especially since the family will make all manner of threats about what will happen if she goes ahead with a marriage they dont approve of (Your uncle in Pakistan will kill himself, your father will lose his job, etc., etc., etc.) Nothing could be more reprehensible than for families to blackmail their daughters in this way, and it is a terrible cause of fitna amongst the youth. We see that someulama in Iran today, such as Ayatullah Ibrahim Amini, have been very strong in condemning this practice, for they have seen how harmful it is to the spiritual state of the youth. Many famlies are under the deluded impression that if they make it impossible for their daughters to marry that the girls will simply sit tight until the permission and possibility of marriage comes. Certainly many do; but of course, as is human nature, many dont. It is entirely possible that the sin of fornication may fall upon the heads of the people who prevented the young from marrying, rather than the young themselves. There is a story that a man was brought to Imam Ali (as) to be punished for fornication. He asked the man if he had been able to marry, and the man said that nobody would allow him to marry, nor did he have the money to purchase a slave girl. Imam Ali (as) then let him go. The authenticity of this story is not verified, but the import remains: that a society that makes it impossible for the young to satisfy themselves sexually is responsible for the fornication that inevitably results. If the young cannot receive the blessing and assistance of their parents in this regard, then it is their duty to rebel against these pressures. We have discussed, elsewhere, the fact that it is not obligatory for a mature girl to seek the permission of her parents to marry, but merely recommended. A system of culture and overly conservative jurisprudence has combined to place barriers on the young, and the only way to break through this is for the young to, quite simply, rebel, and take the matter of marriage into their own hands. It is the right of every mature and sound-minded person to marry, and marriage is one of the greatest blessings of Islam. If the older generation are not willing to accept this fact, than it is upon the younger generation to break the chains that have been set upon them.

Tuesday, January 21, 2020

The Wedding :: essays research papers

  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  In â€Å"The Wedding,† by Dorothy West, the major development I saw was in the character of Shelby. From the beginning till the end, the character changes and deals with many changes. Throughout the novel Shelby knows what she wants, knows she never gave a black a chance, and then decides whom she will marry.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  At the beginning of the novel, Shelby is well focused and knows what she wants. She doesn’t care of what others think. Shelby stays focused on what going to take place and continues with the wedding. Many of her relative’s tries to talk her out of the marriage between her and the white-man, Meade. Although, she did have a little feeling for Lute.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Towards the middle of the novel, Shelby seems to feel a little confused and doesn’t really know what she wants. What people have been telling her seems to be sinking in. She begins to feel a little confused on what she really wants. Especially after the argument between her and her father, Clark. She expected him to support her, yet he also turns his back on her. At this time she feel confused and doesn’t know what to think or what to do. A talk with Liz, Shelby’s sister, convinces her to give a black a chance. Liz explains to Shelby on how she will have to live with her knowing she didn’t give a black a chance. It might come back to haunt her later.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Shelby decides to give the black a chance and decides see Lute. She feels good about seeing Lute, giving her a new sensation, a new feeling. Things seem to be okay and she is almost convinced of not marring Meade. Shelby gives Lute the idea she likes him and want to marry him. Right when Shelby is beginning to feel for Lute, he blows it when he decides to fight with his wife for a divorce. Shelby then is convinced of who she wants to marry.   Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Ã‚  Toward the end of the novel, Shelby is convinced and decides whom she really wants to marry. She decides to stick with her original plans and marries Meade.

Monday, January 13, 2020

Hasty Decisions in Romeo and Juliet Essay

The tragic tale of Romeo and Juliet hosts a plethora of hastily made decisions. As ill-fated as the two star-crossed lovers may have been, the root of all their problems can be traced back to their rash decisions. The reason Romeo and Juliet meet in the first place is because Romeo and Benvolio decide on a whim that they are going to go to the Capulet party to show Romeo that there are other beauties besides Rosaline. After this all of the decisions of the characters are made on the spot, with little to no forethought going into them. Had the characters thought their choices through a bit more thoroughly then perhaps they wouldn’t have had to deal with the resulting tragedy. These are but a few of the flawed choices that ultimately lead to Romeo and Juliet’s untimely demise. As mentioned the decision that caused the ignition of this ill-fated romance was when Romeo and Benvolio made the choice to go to the Capulet party. They hear about it when reading the Capulet messenger’s letter and rashly decide to go to the party so as to help Romeo get over Rosaline. The fact that they willingly decide to go to their enemy’s party to find women is abhorrent since they know the troubles that could ensue if they got caught. If they had put a little more thought into the consequences of such actions then maybe Romeo and Juliet would not have ended up in such a turbulent romance. Another poorly made decision was when after knowing each other for a single day Romeo and Juliet decide to get married. The amount of flaws in their logic whilst deciding upon this course of action is numerous. First, after such a short amount of time they hardly know each other, second, before making such a huge step for their futures it would’ve been wise to first see if they could do anything to help end their families feuding so that they wouldn’t have to keep their love a secret. Their secret marriage inescapably leads to many problems including that Juliet’s dad wants her to marry Paris. Since she is already married this idea throws her into a fit of rage and despair. This leads to another whirlwind of events that in the end forges the way to one of Romeo and Juliet’s final and greatest mistake. The last and quite possibly the biggest mistake that the lovers make is when they decide to take their own lives to be with each other. The reason this happens is due to even more hastily made decisions. The first event that leads to this tragic ending is when Friar Lawrence decides to give Juliet a potion to make her sleep for a day despite not having mentioned any f their plans to Romeo. The friar does send a letter but it gets delayed so Romeo has no idea that Juliet’s death is a hoax. Instead of doing something rational Romeo then decides to purchase a vial of poison and kill himself at Juliet’s grave. At the grave Romeo ends up killing Paris and a few minutes before Juliet is suppose to wake up takes the poison and dies. If Romeo had waited a little longer or tried to go to Friar Lawrence to see about what had happened this catast rophe could have been avoided. Shortly after Romeo dies Juliet wakes up and is stricken with insurmountable despair at his death. When the friar tries to get her to leave the tomb she finds a dagger and kills herself. Juliet’s decision to kill herself because she is unable to be with her lover in life is quite a brash and thoughtless decision. After she woke up she could have left with the friar and tried to sort out her feelings first before making such a permanent decision, but instead her forthright nature gets the best of her and she ends up dead because of it. Romeo and Juliet perfectly depict that rash decisions lead to defective conclusions. In conclusion Romeo and Juliet can be more accurately described as a tale of hastily made decisions leading to unfortunate conclusions rather than the story of two star-crossed lovers who were destined to be kept apart. The key events that lead to their deaths are all caused by someone caught in the heat of the moment and not thinking clearly. From the decision to go to the Capulet party to all the events that contributed to their fast paced romance, perfunctory decisions have overshadowed them all. Through these choices the tragic flaws of Romeo and Juliet are revealed. It becomes apparent early on that Romeo’s tragic flaw is his impulsiveness and inability to control his love for Juliet. Juliet’s tragic flaw is her loyalty towards Romeo which leads to her death when she is separated from him. Romeo and Juliet were the victimized by themselves, and ultimately it ends up leading to their untimely deaths.

Sunday, January 5, 2020

Virtual Child Ages 11-16 Essay - 1505 Words

Maureen Gillespie PSY 206 – Dr. Greenspan Montgomery County Community College April 15, 2013 Assignment #2 Adolescence is defined as the transition between childhood and adulthood. Many changes happen at this stage. Adolescence involves things such as puberty, greater independence, and a time when someone begins to construct their identity. Identity means their life value and goals including a secure sense of who they are in terms of sexual, vocational, and moral ethics. In the next few paragraphs I will be discussing my Virtual Child, Maeve as she went through adolescence (ages 11- 16). I am going to delve into the different changes I saw in her and how they relate to theories proposed by Piaget, Erikson, Marcia, and Gardner. Each†¦show more content†¦At one point, as an act of defiance, she ran off with her boyfriend and they both got matching tattoos. During the times when she was feeling down, she wouldn’t talk much, but always knew she could. But, when Maeve was ready to talk, she was confident in herself and what she stood for. While her decisions weren’t alw ays that irresponsible, we still found that we didn’t always agree with her. But for Maeve, she seemed to know she was in a trial and error phase of growing up and had to see what worked for her. We had to let her develop that. Much like Maeve’s trial and error phase, Erikson’s theory of identity versus role confusion explains psychological conflict of adolescence. This theory states that this conflict is resolved positively when adolescents achieve an identity after a period of exploration and inner soul searching. If a young person’s earlier conflicts were resolved negatively or if society limits their choices to ones that do not match their abilities and desires, they may appear shallow, directionless, and unprepared for the challenges of late adulthood. (p. 314). Maeve luckily didn’t make many choices that were resolved negatively. 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